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“Men don’t protect us, they won’t respect us”: Afghan Diary | Conflict

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Nadima’s family fled Afghanistan when she was a baby. As an adult, she came back. Now, despite fear and uncertainty, the 38-year-old woman refuses to leave again. In this article, she reviews the changes she has witnessed since the Taliban took over her country on August 15. She wanted to know what the future of Afghan women would be like, and questioned why most men don’t stand with them and speak out for their rights.

In the past three days, all of my cousins, whom I haven’t seen in 10 years, have visited Kabul from Mazar and Herat. We all had a great time together.

The room was full of girls, we danced, we all decided to dress up, they all wore my headscarves, we all wore traditional clothes. We sing together, cook, share stories, and talk about everything that happened.

One of my cousins ​​recalled her efforts to become a teacher; now she can’t imagine sitting at home and not teaching. She fought for her education, she protested to her family, and the only person who supported her to go to India to study for a master’s degree was her husband. Even her brother, my cousin, disagrees.

So she can’t imagine staying at home. She worries that her mother’s hit on the knee by the Taliban in 1999 and 2000 may also become her story. She didn’t want to be beaten, just like her mother insisted on running her girls’ school in Hart after the Taliban closed.

My cousin told me that she is very strong and independent, and she will always advocate education. But she didn’t think she wanted to start here, so she was going to Turkey.

“These people don’t know our value, our value, what we have to offer as women, so I will go to a country where I am welcomed and appreciated,” she told me. “I put all my efforts into being here, so I can teach another little girl, and now I will do this for a country that accepts me and wants them to receive an education,” she said.

Some women in Nadima’s family and circle of friends are considering leaving the country to ensure they can continue pursuing their chosen career [Photo courtesy of Nadima]

This makes me sad, you know, because she is very valuable to this country and to the young girls here.

She understands culture, language, education system, because she has experienced them. She is a genius in mathematics and intends to pursue a doctorate degree. But now others will enjoy the fruits of her hard work, a Turkish student. Now in another country, when she should teach children in Afghanistan, another group will learn from her.

We have lost many women like her in this country. I am sad, sad.

I’ll be fine, but everyone left, I was sitting in the room alone, and I was thinking: what should I do?

Because I decided to stay, I can’t even tell anyone how I feel. The other day, when the gunfire rang, I called one of my cousins, who also lives in Kabul and cannot leave. I asked her, “Are you okay?” The celebration of gunfire seemed to be the new normal. We heard it on the day the U.S. withdrawal was completed, and then when Mullah Baradar, the deputy leader of the new Afghan government, arrived in Kabul a few days ago.

“I’ll be fine, but what are you doing here?” she asked.

“I can’t leave,” I said.

“No, you have no reason to call me, no reason to call me. You have chosen to be here-accept it now,” she replied.

So I am not even allowed to express my feelings.

Those who choose to stay here, improve their voice or try to be a part of it and at least observe and understand for themselves, don’t even have a chance.

People began to become indifferent because they were just trying to survive. They worry about the economy, education and health.

What makes me sad is that yes, there has been a change, the change of government, the past history of the Taliban, people are traumatized.

But what does this have to do with women who continue to receive education? What does this have to do with the orphanages that need funding? These orphanages are the victims of the war of the past 20 years? What about the women who are about to give birth in the hospital? What about the nurses and doctors who take care of them?

How can anyone, anyone in the world, decide to leave everything behind instead of thinking about children, young women and young boys, and men themselves?

I think there is a divorce in Afghanistan and the rest of the world.

Nadima has been encouraging her friends and followers to stay in this country and help rebuild it [Photo courtesy of Nadima]

Afghanistan is like a feminine energy-woman-now she has left behind a group of children who depend on this father. And Afghanistan, as a female energy, has become a housewife. She was told: “You don’t need to do anything, we will do everything for you”. But all this is a lie. She left behind a bunch of children; their education, health, social life, everything was deprived.

After what happened in the past month, who will deal with it? Who will send a therapist for this? Who will create healing energy? Now who wants to say we will be fine? Who stood up trying to appease people and said: “We don’t know what the future will be, but we are here and we will not let everyone hang.”

Hollywood movies are very good at shaping these heroes who always save the world. But look at what is happening in reality. Where is the hero? Because this is real, zombies are taking over. This is true, these children are actually really suffering.

A few days ago, I saw women protesting in the street from the window of my house. They were screaming and protesting their rights, while the rest of us were sitting inside.

I looked at my cousin and said, “Look, there are so many women in this city, why are there only 50? [protesting]? “

“It’s all a show,” my cousin replied. “The real people are sitting there watching this. These poor women may be beaten, injured and traumatized, and no one will treat them.

“We fought this kind of battle 15 years ago, 20 years ago. My mother did it, and our grandma did it.

“We now know that there is nothing [that] It can be done for this country, because men, men do not protect us. They will not protest for us, they will not respect us. No one came out to protest for their sisters, mothers, daughters, wives, nieces and granddaughters. “

She said that when we are used, men just want power, money and control. So if men don’t plan to do that for us, what can we do?

Then there are others who become suicide bombers, who think there will be heaven and 70 or 72 virgin bonuses after death.

But this is crazy to me. I don’t understand how they are willing to die for the idea that they will get 72 virgins in heaven, and on earth they won’t even try to fight for a woman, they won’t fight for one—not their own mother. Death, my sister, my grandma, my daughter, my niece.

What surprises me is that they are willing to die for these imaginary women who may enter heaven, but they are not willing to die for women in this country, this world, and this earth.

There are women begging in the street, holding children in their laps. These children have been bitten, they have scars, their mouths are dry from dehydration, their nails are damaged due to lack of vitamins, and they all look malnourished.

These men have zero sympathy for these women and their children, but they will marry a 15-year-old or a 16-year-old or a 17-year-old virgin.

They kill women who sell their bodies to provide food for their families, but they will not kill men who sell women into prostitution. A man stares at a woman on the street, he will not be punished, but the walking woman, who does not disturb anyone, is told to cover up.

Women are constantly being damaged here, while the people who cause the problem move around.

Today, I am alone, all my cousins ​​have left, it is so quiet. The room was full of children. I used to invite friends over for tea at night, but now I am the only one. But thank God, I am not alone.

I will stay and continue to raise awareness and try to smile and create jokes and try to make everyone laugh, because I can at least try-I also want to see things from other parts of the world.

I know this thunder will pass, and I believe the Illuminati will shine in.

* Nadima is referred to by her followers as her other self, Patinggala Kakai. She is a Pashtun social media influencer, focusing on spreading the message of unconditional love and advocating for basic human rights for all.



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