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Television viewers first fell in love with Tamera Mowry-Housley on her groundbreaking and spunky sitcom, Sister, Sister and we have continued our journey with her on The Real and several Hallmark films. Now she adds author to her resume with her heartwarming and candid memoir, You Should Sit Down For This, which she hopes will feel like an afternoon with a close friend sharing tea and fresh-baked cookies.
The book takes readers on quite a journey, from the early days of child beauty pageants, the pressures of being a teenage star with her twin, Tia Mowry, on Sister, Sister, their mother’s positive influence, the craziness of dating later in life and the challenges of balancing family life with a high-profile career.
Related: 50 Sister Quotes That Will Make You Want to Call Her Right Now
Along the way, the favorite girl-next-door treats us to “Tameraisms”, bite-sized pieces of wisdom that she hopes will empower women to step up to life’s unexpected twists, turns, and surprises and make it all work for them.
The aim of the book, she explains, is to remind readers that magic can happen in our lives when we open our minds and hearts to become the very best version of ourselves.
“I like to say that life happens for you, not to you. I like that because everyone can relate to that,” Mowry-Housley exclusively tells Parade.com.
“We are the product of our choices and our experiences,” she adds. “So, if you look at it in the way of, ‘I went through this,’ not ‘why did this happen to me,’ but ‘what did this experience teach me?’ You’ll come out on the other side wiser, smarter, braver and stronger.”
Read on for more on Tamera Mowry-Housley and what the hills and valleys of her career and family life can teach us about our own lives.
How did you pick the subtitle of your book–’A Memoir About Life, Wine and Cookies?’ I am guessing that your go-to is wine and cookies.
Absolutely. Whenever I wanted to feel comforted and warm, or I just wanted to wind down, I would always have a glass of red wine with some chocolate chip cookies, and it always made me feel better. So that is the reason why I chose wine and cookies because that’s the little snack that makes me feel good.
Not knowing that you would wind up in Napa Valley.
And to be the co-owner of a winery, a tasting room, and a coffee house. I never thought that even though I was marrying [journalist and pro baseball player] Adam Housley, a man whose family owned a winery. That’s not why I fell in love with my husband, but I love wine and I thought it was pretty cool. Now we are planting another vineyard on Chimney Rock. So, my life has unfolded in such a beautiful way and I’m extremely grateful for it.
Related: 19 Virtual Tasting Experiences to Bring Wine Country Into Your Home
I enjoyed Sister, Sister the first time it aired. I loved you and Tia on the show. How is she?
She’s fantastic. We know that we must talk to each other every week. When I moved to Napa she cried, but honestly, it brought us closer. We see each other more now because we make the time; we make it a priority. Now that our kids are older, we have a little bit more space and room to make it work for both families.
I have a seven and a nine-year-old. She has an 11-year-old and a four-year-old, so once they are that age, they have many after-school activities. But we now know how to juggle it and make it work. So I’m hosting Thanksgiving dinner for her family and my own.
Are you cooking Thanksgiving dinner?
Absolutely. I’m going to be making my apple pie. I might even make my peach cobbler. I’ll see because obviously, the peaches won’t be in season. But I also make turkey, stuffing, ham, collard greens and mashed potatoes.
Related: Try Tia Mowry’s Blueberry Basil Frosé When You Need to Cool Off on Hot Summer Nights
It sounds delicious. Does your sister also enjoy cooking?
Yes, she does. We’re all amazing cooks in our family, including my brothers, because that’s a skill that my parents instilled in us at a very young age. I knew how to cook a whole Thanksgiving dinner when I was 16 years old.
Are there other shared family activities coming up?
Yes, we’re going to have some fun Halloween festivities at Disneyland together this year. I’m looking forward to it. We really do, we help each other out in life. We still do. Whether that is with relationships, business or Hollywood. I’m very fortunate to have a sibling who has walked the same path; not only that, she’s my twin. We can read each other’s minds pretty much and we’re there for each other.
Have your kids seen Sister, Sister, or any of your other work?
Oh, absolutely. They love Twitches and they love Sister, Sister. My daughter Ariah loves it. My son Aden is a little bit more into anime and Pokémon, whereas Ariah just eats it up. I think that Aden likes the fact that his peers at school know who his mom is, and so definitely I have some cool points now; I’m not as embarrassing as he previously thought!
Talk a little bit about your ‘Tamera-isms.’ Do you have a couple of favorites?
Yes, and one of them is “you define who you are.” Being in this industry for more than 20 years, it’s very easy to have the critics, the naysayers just maybe affect you, you know? Reviews, it’s a fight to make sure that they don’t affect your self-esteem, they don’t define who you are. You’re the one who does that.
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I always say, “Don’t take things personally if they don’t know you personally.” Because nowadays, especially with social media, it’s free rein to just say whatever you want, and they can even address it to you. Whether you want to see it or not, it’s there. But I have learned throughout my life, and in the industry, to definitely protect your peace, your spirit, and who you are as a person. Don’t let anybody take control of that narrative. You are in charge of that.
I feel like my mom and your mom were in cahoots. She would always tell me, ‘If you’re not enjoying the bumps and the bruises, then get off the damn train.’
Yes, it’s true, because that’s life. And we’re not in control of everything, we’re in control of how we respond to it. Because life will throw us curveballs, I don’t care how good you have it. And it feels the same way for someone who’s had a rough life. If your life is starting out rough, it doesn’t mean that it will stay that way.
There is light at the end of that tunnel, you just gotta keep moving. You can’t stay down. You’ve got to keep pushing forward.
Related: Tia Mowry Recalls Being Denied a Magazine Cover for Being Black: ‘It Still Affects Me’
Do you think you and Tia could have accomplished all you have career-wise without your mother’s guidance, support and tough love?
Nope. That’s why still to this day I am so grateful. And I always say, “Mom, if I’m just half the mother that you are still to this day, to me, to my children, my kids are going to be alright.” Because I look back now as a mother, and saw the sacrifice, that reading this book again, and saw her just do it and go through it. It’s different when you’re a kid, you’re kind of, “Oh, that’s my mom, I expect it,” but as you get older you realize that not all moms are like that.
And now that I’m a mom I’m like, “Dang, she put everything on hold so that her children can pursue a dream.“ This was not something our mom told us to do, this is something we asked our mother to do. And she did it.
There’s a lot to be proud of here, but can you tell me how you choose what to put in and leave out of the book? And what are you most proud of besides publishing a book overall?
It really is. It took about two years and there were some tears, there was some fear, there was some anxiety. So I’m very proud I finally did it. And it is my truth—this is who I am. And it’s daunting and scary because I literally put my heart out there, and I’m aware that people may not, and I don’t want to put it out there. I want to speak positively, but I’m aware that I’m not in control of how people receive this. However, what I am in control of is that I know I gave it my all and I was authentically myself.
Tamera Mowry Housley in the Hallmark movie “Girlfriendship”
John Michael Apsey/Hallmark
I was laughing out loud when you and your sister left the hotel at the heyday of Sister, Sister and thought you wouldn’t be recognized.
My brain was like, “No, I just want to be normal.” I wasn’t thinking that at all. I didn’t know New York was like that. I should have, because our highest ratings were in New York and Chicago. So now looking back, you would be correct, yes, that it is exactly what would have happened!
It showed though, even though we were at the height of our careers, you still have this yearning to be normal. Like, I just wanted to walk down the street and just be. But I am grateful because if it weren’t for the fans our show wouldn’t have been what it was, and what it still is. That’s what’s insane. This show is still kicking butt, it’s crazy.
Where did you find the gumption as a teenager to pitch a TV show to network executives?
Well, this is what was awesome about going back in time when writing the book. When you’re a child, sometimes it’s like, “Dang, if I had to start my career all over again at the age I am right now, I don’t know.” I did not take no for an answer because you don’t know any different. You’re just young, you’re ready, and you have that zest for life. I look back and I’m like, “Yeah, we pitched it.”
My sister and I met with Irene Dreyer, and Suzanne de Passe, and we loved Sweet Valley High, that show, and of course The Parent Trap. We just got our heads together, thought of an idea with Kim Bass as well, who’s known for all that, and we would go to different networks and pitch it, and sometimes do a scene.
It’s just about having the confidence, the faith and even hearing no’s and to keep on going. I always say when I look back, that little girl still inspires me. She’s inspired me today to keep going. As I get older I have new aspirations and certain shows that I want to be on. There’s always room for evolving and getting better.
Lyndie Greenwood, Tamera Mowry-Housley and Krystal Joy Brown in the recent Hallmark movie, “Girlfriendship”
John Michael Apsey/Hallmark
Tell me about Girlfriendship on Hallmark.
Girlfriendship is a lovely story that I could relate to. That’s why I took it. It’s about these three women who are supposed to be going on kind of like a girlfriend drinking party retreat. We call it a “turn-up.” A turn-up retreat for Samara’s birthday, and that’s the character I play. But what ends up happening is one of the girl’s assistants books the wrong trip, and it’s more about rediscovering yourself.
Each of these girls is at a pivotal moment in their life where they’re existing, but they’re not living. This trip challenges them to search within and not live for their mom or their dad, or not live just for their children. Don’t forget who you are even though you’re married and have kids, or go for that business opportunity to evolve. That is what this movie is about. And of course, it’s Hallmark, so it has romance. But romance isn’t necessarily the center of it, it’s more about having that romance with yourself, and each girl has a different rediscovery.
It’s directed by one of the actresses, Keshia Knight Pulliam. It’s a beautiful full-circle moment for me because Keshia played Rudy on The Cosby Show and being inspired by her is the reason why I got into acting in the first place.—and here we are now and she directed me to this film. It was an absolutely amazing experience and Keshia is now one of my dear friends.
What are you working on next?
I just finished shooting Prime Video’s first baking show called the Dr. Seuss Baking Challenge. I hosted it. I just finished shooting a Hallmark Countdown to Christmas film, Inventing The Christmas Prince. I’m grateful to be a “Hallmark queen,” as they call me now. Those movies are just so beautiful. The stories are so awesome and just wonderful. I get to work with amazing talent and I get to hone my acting. I still get to work and I am extremely grateful to be a working actress.
Related: Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star! Christmas Comes Twice for Tamera Mowry-Housley
Why do you want everyone else to read and enjoy the book? Why does that mean so much to you?
Yes, this is a memoir—it’s about my life, but I always like to do things in return to get something back. So again, in the beginning, I talked to you about how much I love to share, these experiences that I’ve gone through, these words of wisdom that I have learned throughout my life, it does nothing for me if I hold that all in myself. I want to share them with the world.
They’re like little tidbits in helping you live just a happier life. I want this book to encourage people, to inspire people. To feel seen and heard, as maybe a woman who’s struggling in a relationship or a mother who is trying to find that balance between career and home life. If you’re in a rut with your marriage here are some tidbits to help you get out of it. Because we’ve all been there. These little things help me have a happier life because I choose happiness. It doesn’t mean I have a perfect life, but because of these little bits of wisdom, I was able to enjoy it along the way.
Next, find out the next book to read based on your favorite fall TV shows.
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