Cheers to the hard-working and hard-working stepmother | Entertainment

In a speech read by the Senate and published in the Congressional Record, Santorum acknowledged the day and praised Lizzie’s creation.

Stepparents have probably been around since the dawn of man. One biological parent dies, then the surviving parent remarries, and you have a stepfather family.

This “traditional” pattern has become diverse and complex in recent decades due to the growing number of divorces, cohabitations, illegitimate children and same-sex marriages. With this diversity comes increasingly different demands on stepparents.

Using census data, the researchers estimated that 1,300 new stepfather families are formed in the United States every day. But that number is a big guess, since it’s impossible to track the exact number and characteristics of all possible “non-traditional” step-family combinations.

The Step Family Foundation, which tries to track trends, reports that more than 50 percent of families have separated from their original parent-child relationship as a result of remarriage or reunion.

The Pew Research Center reports that 42 percent of adults have a stepparent relationship — a stepparent, step-sibling or half-sibling, or a stepchild. About 40 percent of new marriages in the United States are remarriages by one or both partners.

For this article, people on Facebook were asked to reflect on their experiences raising or having stepparents. Reactions were mixed.

Dianna Anderson, a retired teacher, writes that she was “very lucky to have wonderful stepparents. Since my parents quarrel when they talk to each other, my stepparents negotiate all the big decisions — like braces , visitation rights changes, cars, schools, etc.”

“I always felt that my stepparents loved me,” she recalls, adding that both of her biological parents insisted that their new spouses “must love me too! Dad lost a girl like a hot potato because she Don’t want me around.”

Another Facebook friend described a very different and tense relationship when his father married another woman in her 20s.

A now-retired lawyer and Facebook friend described a stepparent arrangement so complex and fluid that you need a diagram to understand it. But it seems to work because both biological parents put their children’s needs above their own self-interest. His children are now successful adults.

Psychologist Judith Wallerstein writes: “Children of divorce tend to do well if mothers and fathers resume their parenting roles regardless of remarriage, putting aside their differences and allowing children to continue their relationship with both parents.” Accident divorce inheritance. However, she added, sadly few children have this advantage.

Robin Pudge, a local human resources consultant, describes an increasingly common stepparenting situation: a childless career woman marries a child-bearing man.

Robin was 26 and in graduate school at the time, and her husband, Patrick, a CPA, was 30 when they married 34 years ago. Patrick’s daughter, April, was 10 at the time and lived with her mother in another city.

For the first eight years of their marriage, Robin and Pat visited April as often as possible. Because they’d rather have her in their lives, they invite April to live with them after high school.

“I don’t have kids, so I don’t have experience raising kids,” Robin said, admitting she thinks 18-year-olds are “adults” and will act like one.

“But she was a kid and she did some silly things. My expectations were too high, so there was a bit of a bump.”

“However, I was very lucky. Her mother did a great job, so I didn’t have to raise her, and neither did I,” Robin said.

Her advice to other stepparents—especially those entering the older child’s life—is to let the birth parent take the lead in spending time—special time—alone with the child to form a bond. A relationship develops between a stepparent and a stepchild, perhaps more like a friendship than a parental relationship.

An article “The Stepparent’s Dilemma,” published in The Atlantic last year, describes this approach to becoming a stepparent.

Stepparents Lori and David Sims each brought children into their mixed-race families when they married. While the arrangement started off smoothly, they say “everything went sour” during the second year, when they argued about parenting and the behavior of their respective children.

On the verge of divorce, they went to a counselor. When Lori complained about her husband and his kids’ lack of discipline, the counselor kept telling her, “They’re not your kids.” The counselor talked so much it sounded like “They’re NACHO.”

With a good sense of humor that seemed to save their sanity and their marriage, the couple started a movement and Facebook group: Nacho Kids Nacho Parenting.

Lori no longer worries about whether David’s children did their chores or finished their homework. She couldn’t help biting her tongue when she disagreed with the way David was handling the child’s problems. They are not her children. She will help when asked. But parenting is up to David.

Not everyone agrees with this approach. Some stepparents demand “equal” parenting rights. But Lori and David found it a realistic strategy.

Robin’s step-daughter April is now an adult with a child of her own. Robin describes their relationship as friendship.

But when it comes to grandchildren—April’s children—Robin is Nonni, and Patrick is Nonno, which means grandmother and grandfather in Italian.

“I never had children, but my husband provided me with a wonderful stepdaughter, and she provided me with two wonderful granddaughters and a wonderful son-in-law,” Robin said. “They’re my family and I’ve always advised bypassing the births and having stepsons instead.”